


Holby Hogwarts

by Say_it_aint_so



Category: Holby City
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, Hogwarts AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-03-21
Packaged: 2019-03-10 13:07:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13502188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Say_it_aint_so/pseuds/Say_it_aint_so
Summary: Hogwarts AU. A series of connected one shots of the Holby Crew's adventures as students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.





	1. All Aboard the Hogwarts Express

Jasmine Burrows stared, wide-eyed, at the bright red steam engine, incredulous that this secret train platform existed, that she was able to walk through a brick wall, that she was magic. 

She adjusted her grip on the battered suitcase she’d bought with the last of the money she’d scrounged as it fell out of Paula’s pockets when she’d stumbled, drunk, around their pokey cottage. Her palms were slick and she was desperately glad that Hogwarts robes were black so no one could see the damp circles under her arms. 

She had to make a good impression. 

They had to like her. 

Someone had to like her. 

“Move, mudblood.” A boy kicked her bag out of his way, brown eyes glaring down at her with a disgust she was used to seeing from the posh boarding school boys that liked to throw rocks at the cottage. They’d stopped the day that she’d magically sent the rocks flying straight back at them. They’d called her a freak but they’d never tried to throw rocks in her direction again. 

But there wasn’t any rocks around and she could tell from the green trim on his robes that he was older than her. He knew magic that she’d barely read about, dreamed about from the moment Professor Beauchamp had knocked on the door and told her that she wasn’t a freak but a witch and she had a place in a school with people like her and her mother couldn’t refuse to let her escape her mundane life.   
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean –“ Apologies babbled from her lips like a brook. “Sorry.”

“You should be.” He stepped closer. She could smell his expensive cologne. He was exactly like those boarding school boys. Magic couldn’t prevent cruelty, apparently. 

She dropped her gaze, shoulders drooping. “Sorry.”

“Lay off, Issac.” Jasmine looked up to see a boy with the bluest eyes she’d ever seen striding over to them with a confidence she wished she had. “Unless, of course,” the boy continued, “you want a detention before you even get on the train.” He tapped the shiny silver badge next to his red lapel. Gryffindor. 

Jasmine hadn’t wanted to join the house of bravery and chivalry. Being brave always ended in bruises. But Blue Eyes was making her rethink that decision.

“Blood traitor.” Issac spat at her hero and turned in his shiny leather shoes, storming away with his nose arrogantly high in the air. 

A girl with black eyeliner so sharp and so dark that magic must have been involved put a gentle hand on her shoulder, “Ignore him. He is arsehole.” She wore long black lace sleeves under yellow trimmed robes and had long black hair intricately braided into two large buns on tops of her head. 

“Frieda! No swearing in front the firsties.” Blue eyes ran a hand through his brown hair, exasperatedly. “You’ll scare them for life. And Penny will lecture me.”

“Valentine, I’m sure the firstie has heard the word. And Issac said much worse.” Frieda looked at Jasmine. “You have heard that word before, yes?”

She nodded. “Used it a few myself.” She tried to smile, to cheerful. People liked cheerful. They didn’t like sadsacks with alcoholic mothers who felt sorry for themselves. 

“See, no harm done.” Frieda let her arm fall off Jasmine’s shoulder. “Muggleborn, right?”

“Is it that obvious?”

“Yes.” Frieda said bluntly.

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” the boy- Valentine – added hurriedly. “Most people are cool with it. People like Issac are – “

“Arseholes.” Jasmine supplied with a genuine cheeky grin. She could do this friendship thing. “So I’ve heard.”

“Oliver Valentine, Gryffindor prefect.” Oliver held out his hand and she shook it.

“Jasmine Burrows.”

“Urg. You’ve got to be kidding me.” A tall redhead with cheekbones so sharp they could cut diamonds groaned loudly. She’d been passing them, levitating her own battered trunk in front of her, parting the crowd like it was the red sea and she was Moses, but froze the second she’d heard that name. Jasmine thought she’d looked a little familiar but she mostly looked scary so she kept her mouth shut. 

“Problem Jac?”Oliver shoved his hands in his pockets looked at her. 

“Shove off Valentine and keep your annoying firstie away from me.” Jac flicked her wand elaborately and her trunk pushed through the middle of their group and flew to join the pile of cases waiting to be put on the train. “I mean it.” She walked through the gap her trunk had made for her, green scarf trailing behind her, and stepped on the train without looking back.

Frieda rolled her eyes. “Ignore her. She has issues.” She flicked her wand and Jasmine’s suitcase flew out of her hands and towards Jac’s. Her battered case hit the trunk with such force that it fell over. “Ooops. I didn’t not mean to do that.” 

Jasmine stifled a giggle, trying not to think about that somewhat familiar face. She wanted a new start and didn’t want to face whatever childhood bully also turned out to be a witch. “Magic is awesome.” 

“Yes it is.” Oliver wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Come on, you can sit with us. You can be our token firstie for this year.” 

Jasmine blinked at him, stumbling into step with him as he walked towards the Hogwarts Express. “Are you sure?”

“Boy Valentine has a saving people problem,” Frieda told her as they stepped onto the train. “But Girl Valentine has a helping people problem. Adopting stray firsties is her thing.” 

Jasmine didn’t quite understand but followed the two new people she dared call friends. They wandered down the narrow corridor, weaving through streams of excited students looking for friends. They passed a nervous looking boy with a bird’s nest of black curls and Jasmine wanted to grab him and let him join the merry band she’d lucked into. But she didn’t. 

Oliver stopped suddenly and flung open a door, leading them into a small compartment. He jumped backwards into a seat, swinging his legs into the lap of a small red head, who sighed exasperatedly but didn’t try to push his legs off. She used them as a reading nook for her massive textbook. Jasmine guessed that she was “Frieda swore in front of our new Firstie.”

At this, the redhead looked up at the goth Hufflepuff. “Frieda!” Jasmine noticed the blue tie perfectly knotted around her neck. Ravenclaw. That explained the textbook.

Frieda shrugged nonchalantly and sat down next to her. “It was Issac.”

“Oh that’s okay then.” The redhead went back to her book and Frieda put her head on her shoulder, closing her eyes to nap. 

Jasmine sat down, glancing at the brunette in distressed muggle jeans for permission. The girl nodded with a smile and looked back to Oliver and the redhead as if awaiting a show.

“That’s okay then?” Oliver parroted mockingly. He put his hands behind his head and stretched out to lean against the window, the defining picture of the idle rich. “I swore around a firstie and you hit me, Pen.”

“A, you deserved it, B, Issac is an arsehole.” The redhead ticked off the letters on her hand like she was counting off a list. “And C, you deserved it.”

“You warm the cockles of my heart, sister dear.” Oliver put a hand over his heart dramatically. 

The brunette she was sitting next to turned to face her. “Your manners are slipping Valentine. Your governess would be heartbroken. You haven’t introduced your new friend.” Zosia out her hand to Jasmine, who shook it tentatively. “Zosia March, Syltherin, 2nd year. Don’t worry about where you’re sorted you’ll have one of us with you. What house are you wanting?” 

"Any that will have me."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She could clearly remember booting many students out of cupboards, smirking with Edward at their animalistic amorous fumbles as the students stumbled out of cupboards with trousers and skirts around their ankles. 
> 
> She'd never loose her inhibitions like that, she'd thought. Her relationship with Edward was lovely romantic walks and chase kisses on cheeks. 
> 
> Her relationship with Bernie, however...

All her life Serena had been the rule-abiding teacher's pet. She'd had skirts an inch longer than regulation, had her homework handed in a day early and won the Quidditch cup for Slytherin three times in a row as the first female captain. 

She'd been too busy, too scared of breaking the sacred rules her mother had beat into her, to have dalliances in the supplies cupboards. She'd been too closeted, too naïve, to realise how much fun they were. 

She could clearly remember booting many students out of cupboards, smirking with Edward at their animalistic amorous fumbles as the students stumbled out of cupboards with trousers and skirts around their ankles. 

She'd never loose her inhibitions like that, she'd thought. Her relationship with Edward was lovely romantic walks and chase kisses on cheeks. 

Her relationship with Bernie, however...

"You're thinking too much. Stop thinking." Bernie said, the words sharp little gasps punctuated by a stream of kisses down Serena's neck. As the resident Defence against the Dark Arts teacher, she'd said before they'd stumbled, arms linked, into the supply cupboard, she'd be remiss not to inspect the Deputy Headmistress for signs of vampiric interference. After all, Bernie had smirked, she was much more relaxed and even the normally obtuse students had noticed her cheerful mood. Several seventh years (and one overly ambitious fifth year) had inquired about the glamour charms on Serena's neck. She'd told the seventh years to go study more and told Digby to go find a girl and give her a reason to practice the charm. 

"I'm not," Serena protested, arching her back into the wood door as Bernie's adroit fingers traced runes on her upper thighs over the soft silks of her long robes. 

"Convince me." Bernie smiled that goddam smile that could make even the staunchest angel's knees weak. She put her hands on either side of Serena's face, moving her body back so they were centimetres apart. "Say the magic word."

"Abracadabra?" Serena leant forward and pressed a fleeting kiss to her nose. 

Bernie pulled back further. "Not that one. The other one." Long fingers calloused by years an Auror slowly, teasingly, started unbuttoning her shirt. "Goodness, it's getting hot in here, isn't it?"

"Only because you're in here."

"You say the sweetest things but that's not the magic word." Bernie undid another button. She only had one left.

Serena stared at the rise and fall of Bernie's breasts, the cups of her bra exposed for fleeting seconds when she took a breath. She dragged her eyes up to meet Bernie's. "Please."

"There's the magic word," Bernie breathed before launching herself at Serena, cupping a hand behind her head to protect it from banging against the door.

Serena, never one to yield control, pushed forward and they stumbled backwards until they collided with the shelves. Her hand undid the last button of Bernie's blouse. Bernie's lips found that spot on her collar bone that made her scream. Her finger's kneaded Bernie's breast. Bernie arched into her touch. 

The door opened. 

Four people screamed. 

Bernie shouted a spell. The door slammed shut. 

They looked at each other, panting, eyes wide. "Who was it?" Serena asked, hurriedly helping Bernie redo her buttons. It wouldn't do to have two senior members of staff caught canoodling in the storage cupboards like, well, teenagers. 

"My eyes! My eyes! Oh my eyes!" The pained yelps outside the door were coloured with a Scottish accent. 

"Ah." Serena closed her eyes in realisation. "Could be worse."

"How?" Bernie did her final button, hand skimming down her front to check they hadn't missed any. They had to salvage this situation with some dignity. 

"Could be Jac Naylor. She'd blackmail reference letters out of us."

"True." Bernie took a deep breath and at Serena nod, opened the door to face the two head boys that had caught them red-handed. "Gentlemen."

"So all your speeches about not sneaking around to make out in cupboards, you just wanted to keep them all for yourselves, yeah?" Adrian Fletch, the Hufflepuff headboy who was so loyal that he turned down headship because he thought his boyfriend deserved it more apparently had less loyalty for the teachers that had taught him how not to explode feathers over said boyfriend. 

He had the same bright grin that he'd had when Hanson had announced that Hogwarts would have four head students, one for each house. He'd had the same glint in his eyes when he saw Jac Naylor decapitate Peeves for being more irritating than normal.

(The ghost had rematerialised three days later but was never rude to another redhead girl again. Penny Valentine had baked Jac cookies in thanks). 

Serena looked pointedly at the boys' swollen lips and tousled hair. "And you two weren't doing the same thing?"

"Absolutely not." Raf de Luca couldn't hide his shit-eating grin. He'd just won a bet with Oliver Valentine and now the younger Gryffindor would have to clean his room for a week. He'd just known that his two favourite teachers were dating but no one had believed him. 

"We were just patrolling like responsible students, unlike certain members of staff." Fletch looked pointedly at their swollen lips and tousled hair. 

"Okay." Bernie sighed heavily. "What will it take for you to forget you ever saw this?"

"I don't know." Raf stuck his hands in his pockets, eyes on the floor. "I mean that image is seared into my brain. I mean Professor Campbell, you're like my mother and -"

"-Seeing that, it just ain't right." Fletch finished his sentence. 

Bernie folded her arms, blinking stoically at them. "I'll remember that the next time I catch you playing footsie in class."

"I think," Serena said slowly, her brain whirring with an idea that would benefit everyone. "That, apropos of nothing, i may have been too harsh in limiting the hours Quidditch teams can practice." After Jac Naylor had made her team practice for ten hours straight and Zosia March had fallen asleep and flown into a goal post, Serena had banned any team from practicing on the pitch for more than ten hours a week total, which hadn't made her the post popular teacher. 

"We get more pitch time?" Fletch asked, eyes lighting up. Both boys captained their respective Quidditch teams passionately and breathed the sport like she'd once done. 

She nodded. "I will be announcing it at breakfast tomorrow but pitch time will be on a first come first serve basis so if you happen to be in the pitch at breakfast time, you may get to the sign on sheet first."

"But only if you don't tell anyone," Bernie added with a stern look. 

"We understand."

"Our lips are sealed."

The boys ran off to prepare training session plans and probably to find another cupboard to snog in. 

Serena sighed and gripped the bridge of her nose. "I need a shiraz."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So to clarify, Serena is a former Slytherin (ambition was her middle name) deputy headmisstress and will be the transfiguration professor, Bernie is DADA professor and former Auror from Gryffindor. They are madly in love. Raf and Fletch are also madly in love and have secretly adopted a bunch of animals (called the Fletchlings). When Hanson offered Fletch headboy, he thought honestly that Raf would be better at it. Hanson, naturally, changed the rules so they would both be headboy. Jac, naturally, was pissed that the prestige and power of her headship was diluted by such a ludicrous decision, which may form another chapter later.

**Author's Note:**

> So, for starters we have:
> 
> Oliver Valentine : Gryffindor - He jumped in front of a bullet. He's in the brave house.
> 
> Penny Valentine: Ravenclaw - She isn't the smartest Valentine but she values intelligence and strives to achieve it 
> 
> Frieda Petranko: Hufflepuff - Frieda has the biggest heart and is loyal to a fault. And a sarcastic goth hufflepuff is hilarious to me. 
> 
> Issac Doesn'tdeservealastname: Slytherin - he's a snake with ambitions 
> 
> Jac Naylor: Slytherin - is there another option for our ambitious, incredible queen?
> 
> Jasmine - TBA. 
> 
> Lofty - TBA but totes Hufflepuff. I was considering Gryffindor and having a Neville Longbottom thing going and a shocking love affair with his Slytherin bf but kindness is kinda is defining feature. 
> 
> I have lists for where i think the others are and almost all of the characters since s12 will be popping up somewhere.
> 
> Also, I won't be posting these in chronological order. It will be just as the muse strikes. Apologies. 
> 
> Feel free to pop by my tumblr (say-it-aint-so) to chat about the sorting or just to say hi.


End file.
